Thanks to Brad, Jeannie, and everyone at Crosshatch and the Hill House for a beautiful residency <3
The isolation and peaceful simplicity of this house in the woods was cleansing, like a long meditation. I learned to really appreciate quiet – in the environment and in the mind – and notice the beautiful sounds that reveal themselves when you take the care to listen, even when you think there is “silence”. There is never silence, not really.
I enjoyed the space: Space between thoughts, between words, between that moment after the fire goes out and when I head upstairs for bed. Or the space between the sound of one distant truck passing by and another, where you can hear the tiny song of some faraway bird, or the knock of a woodpecker.
Who can find a proper grave for such damaged mosaics of the mind, where they may rest in pieces? Life goes on, but in two temporal directions at once, the future unable to escape the grip of a memory laden with grief.
– Lawrence Langer, Holocaust Testimonies: The Ruins of Memory
Nobody wants to remember trauma. In that regard society is no different from the victims themselves. We all want to live in a world that is safe, manageable, and predictable, and victims remind us that this is not always the case. In order to understand trauma, we have to overcome our natural reluctance to confront that reality and cultivate the courage to listen to the testimonies of survivors.
– Bessel Van Der Kolk, The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma
maybe I should get this tattooed.
I wrote this post in february 2008 and forgot to publish it haha. whoops. Well I’ve been using homemade cloth pads almost exclusively since then. They are super comfortable, super cheap, not wasteful, and make me happy to be bleeding. Call me whatever you want, but I think it’s fun to bleed on stuff for days without dying. I sewed faces on some of my pads so they look like blood-guzzling monsters.
Anyway, here’s how to make one of your own!
Basically, there are two layers. The bottom layer has a break in the middle where you can slide your padding in. And there are two wings that hug your underpants to keep it all in place.
Materials: Thick cotton, flannel, hemp… anything absorbent. Used cloth is usually the softest and most comfy. You will also want stuff for padding — you can sew up little inserts, or just cut more pieces of scrap fabric. <- a great use for those lonely old single socks. When in a pinch, I just put toilet paper in there.
Instructions: Just sew it together. Don’t forget to leave the opening to slip the filler in.
* don’t wanna make your own? check out etsy.
Some more thoughts on veganism, this time turning to a few questions…
A common question:
Where do you get your protein?
Beans, nuts, whole grains, soy products like tempeh and tofu, and a bit here and there in veggies.
“Plant proteins alone can provide enough of the essential and non-essential amino acids, as long as sources of dietary protein are varied and caloric intake is high enough to meet energy needs.” – American Heart Association
A less common question:
Where do you get your diabetes, heart attacks, high blood pressure, and cardiovascular disease?
Don’t forget about obesity and cancer as well.
Note: I am aware that, as with any diet, it needs to be done intelligently for it to be nutritionally beneficial — not all vegans are super healthy. My point is that you don’t need a ton of milk and flesh to be healthy and happy.
see also: “why I am vegan, pt 1“
woke up half naked this morning.
driving home later, I got lost. ended up in a chasm after sunset. I ran barefoot through it till my toes were numb. I felt great.
later at night, someone handed a book to my friend, put it down on the table. I opened it up and the first words I laid eyes on were “narrow chasm”.
and further: “Mind is a dominatrix. The poet‘s inner life is womblike.“
I want more porn that celebrates the human body for its gorgeousness, juicyness, and deliciousness without degrading it with trashy shit.
I think the problem is that porn often(/always?) relies on standardized “fantasy” scripts and gender relations, while obscuring sensory pleasure with excessive polishing (waxed body hair, head-to-toe makeup…), flat lighting, and low-quality video. The acts replace lusty passion with mechanical pumping and staged “ahhh”s. They replace deeply complex orgasms with nothing.
I see a blur of plastic-y shapes banging against each other.
I want pure sensory pleasure.
The fuckin body is more than enough. it is more.
The fuckin body.
———>>> queer porn survey <<<<------------------- by soobjects